[13 Apr 2005|03:59pm]

my lips are painted just so, my shirt plunges just so, my hair falls over my eyes just so

you are such a beautiful influence

he turns to me and he says, dis is what he sez to me

my girl you are lovely. lovely you are my girl. girl my you are lovely.

please do not notice the gaps in my teeth, the shortness of my fingers.

[10 Apr 2005|11:48pm]

I can't stand looking at another picture of myself so here is Daniel killed a deer while Pa looks on happily.

It's 4:30 in the morning.

I can't sleep.

I feel crawly skinned and my body hurts. And I try to read things and my stomach starts boiling up into my chest like when you were in 7th grade and it's almost time to do your presentation in front of the class with a mixture of sitting in the doctor's office waiting to do a blood test.

Look, there's a dead deer.

[07 Apr 2005|08:20pm]

POPPIES

She loves blood-red poppies for a garden to walk in.
In a loose white gown she walks
and a new child tugs at cords in her body.
Her head to the west at evening when the dew is creeping,
A shudder of gladness runs in her bones and torsal fiber:
She loves blood-red poppies for a garden to walk in.

Carl Sandburg

[01 Apr 2005|08:07pm]

Adam sent me flowers a while ago. see. There are green roses. What other flower would be more perfect for me than green roses. Also they are not green roses. Jade roses. THEY ARE JADE ROSES. They were don't be blue roses. I was blue. MAYBE I WAS AZURE. The card said, "CALM DOWN" I love him.

[01 Apr 2005|01:28am]

i am applying to grad schools.

i am afraid they will all come back saying, "sorry we don't want you."

and then what?